monday and wednesday

i worked on monday night. i was having INSANE pms. i felt totally grouchy and exhausted from the moment i got there. it wasn't very fun. i kept thinking, "how am i going to finish this shift?" and i had a customer who was tipping me to sit with him all night, which was great for money, but i find that sitting with someone talking can often be WAY more exhausting than dancing for them. this particular guy was super nice, but fielding his bragging/self-deprecating remarks/date requests was a lot of work. i didn't want him to leave because i wanted him to keep tipping me. but i was also bummed every time i got offstage to find that he was still there. he stayed till the very end. he must've drank like ten vodka tonics. it shocks me how much people can drink, i mean if i'd had ten drinks, i would've died of alcohol poisoning.

today i worked the day shift. slowest shift since i started working there, and so BORING. i worked with a girl i like, but that was the only good thing. oh the other good thing was that a guy came in and brought us cookies. i got my period yesterday and today just felt like one long game of "hide the tampon string." i don't love working whilst on the rag. i'm so listless and lethargic. disillusioned with the state of the world and my place in it. i get crazy right before my period, and then the first day or two i'm still not quite myself. tomorrow should be better, though.

nothing good to say today. goodnight.