oh hey remember how i wrote about the guy who wanted to take me to tahiti? well the other night i was in the dressing room getting ready for work and a co-worker was stretching on the floor looking super tan and mellow. "wow," i said, "you're really tan." "oh yeah, i got a lot of sun on my trip," she said. "really? where'd you go?" "TAHITI," she said. i asked her if it was with this certain customer, YES IT WAS. and she's so smart she totally navigated it in such a way that she didn't have to make out with him or anything. a lot of girls would say that and i'd be like, "yeah, sure you didn't," but this girl is not the type to lie. she told me about the trip, how it was almost unbelievably lavish and amazing, like fancier than anything she ever dreamed of. and i was happy she went instead of me. because, for one thing, she really worked it out and also i would never have been able to relax enough to enjoy vacationing with a dude stranger. i've become increasingly high-strung of late.
in other news, a different customer hounded me for weeks to go on a trip with him to scottsdale, arizona. by car. when he asked me at first, i almost thought he was kidding. i mean, i really can imagine very few things less appealing than driving through desert wasteland with a retired white-wine sipping medical accoutrement salesman in an aging mercedes bound for SCOTTSDALE. what's even IN scottsdale? a "very nice resort" where he enjoys free stays courtesy of an old business connection. blech! no!
i'll tell you what, though, i told him no right from the start, but i was sure to sound a bit wishy-washy about it, like there was a chance i could suddenly change my mind in the three weeks till it came time for the trip. i wanted him to keep buying tons of dances from me right up until he left, because i was sure that all those solitary hours on hwy 95-S would convince him that it had been a mistake to ever waste his money (and affections) on me.
i got an email from him today saying he had taken a detour and was lunching in palm springs, alone. boy am i missing out.
what else? i've been working kind of A LOT, and i've had some super great shifts, like pre-recession stripping. that makes me feel hopeful.
something that does NOT make me feel hopeful, however, are fucked up customers, like this guy on saturday night who was super manhandly while i was giving him a private dance, and then fucking scratched my back with all his fingernails from my shoulders to my tailbone. it happened fast, and yet also excrutiatingly slowly. i screamed, "OUCH DON'T SCRATCH ME!" and he goes, "chill out." in that moment, if i could've hit him over the head with a giant object, i would definitely have done so. he left after that, but i had eight (the thumbs didn't scratch, just the fingers. duh.) bright red lines down my back for the rest of the night. my co-worker dabbed them with ice and hand sanitizer and that was sweet.
after that happened, i totally did not have any hustle in me for the rest of the night. i sat at the end of the bar with this really sweet customer who likes to be dominated and i ordered him to face all my ones and put them in bundles of $25. when he'd finished the job and i saw i'd made over $600, i called it good and just chilled out for the rest of the night with my striped back.
hmm. what else. i don't know. everybody is blending together these days.
i'm working tomorrow and the next night. i will jot down some notes if anybody's funny.
xo andi
oh hey p.s. i just stumbled onto a new blog you might like: http://titsandsass.com
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