opposites

(the internet is down at my house, so this is from Sunday)

i often see customers all around town, but there are two specific regulars i just see EVERYWHERE.

one is a hipster dyke, diesel jeans, $100 flannel, perfectly coiffed justin beiber hairdo. etc. a little more storebought-polished than the girls i usually go out with, but when i first saw her i did think she was hot, although now i dislike her to intensely that i can't imagine ever thinking she was anything but a skeevy little perv. she's a good customer, a great tipper, usually buys dances, but out of the club she is proving to be a nightmare.

i keep seeing her whenever i go to a queer dance party or event, and she always makes creepy eyes at me and does something inappropriate. like instead of being like, "hi how are you? can i buy you a drink?" or anything you'd say to a regular girl out in the regular world, she treats me like she's a customer and i'm working. i wanna be like, "HELLO. welcome to the idea of strippers as complex people who have a life outside of their job." like if you saw your favorite waitress at a party, would you ask her to go get you some more ketchup?

i don't mind the creepy lecherous staring that much, but the last two times i've seen her she has gotten really jerky. i was performing (music, not sexy stuff) at a party last month, and after i was done i was just milling around and she walked past me and smacked my ass so hard i fell against my ex-date. i was so pissed and offended, but also drunk and embroiled in lesbian drama of my own. i felt like chasing her down and beating the shit out of her, i was so mad. but she disappeared into the crowd. i decided if i saw her again that night i was going to have her thrown out. but i didn't see her again.

i saw her again last night, though, at another party where i was performing. i was having a SUPER great night and i didn't want to give any energy into letting her possibly ruin it so i just totally steered clear of her all night. somehow, though, she found me AGAIN and she went to smack my ass but i yelled, "DO! NOT! DO! IT!" she acted like i was being funny, like we are in on some joke together. but she did go away. if she ever shows up at my club again, i'm going to bitch her out. p.s. i hope she realllly enjoyed the lapdances she's bought from me over the past 2 years, because she is NEVER EVER getting another.

the other regular customer who i see whenever i go out lately is a super cute effeminate straight boy who works at new seasons. he's not a big $ customer or anything, but he comes in and tips decently, and whenever he gets paid he buys a few dances. i actually really LIKE seeing him out, because he's just so nice. i saw him last night about five minutes after i saw the douchey girl, and i was like, "WOW. if this isn't a case of opposites, i don't know what is." i mean, usually it would be the dude who would be all skeezy and entitled, and the girl would be the one you'd enjoy running into. sometimes things are switched, i guess.