Monday, August 20, 2012

beefcake bubble bath

i was in new york last week. the plan was to work a bunch, but it ended up being mostly a vacation. i did see a couple massage clients, though. one was an outcall in central park west (is that what you call the part of the upper west side that is right next to central park? i'm not a new yorker).

i showed up to the guy's apartment on the 7th floor of a big brownstone building. and let me tell you first of all that the place was like no other apartment i've been in. it was a total palace and very classy rustic, like walking into a chic mountain lodge. real bearskin rug. huge overstuffed oxblood leather couches. HUGE tv blaring a game (i can't remember what it was, maybe olympic basketball? i dunno).

the client invited me in, and was real stiff and awkward, wouldn't really make eye-contact. when people don't make eye contact, i get nervous and immediately identify my exit route, should i need it. i didn't see my "donation" anywhere, i hate having to ask. JUST PUT IT WHERE I CAN SEE IT. DUH. so i asked to use the restroom because i had to pee, and also because i was hoping when i got back he'd have left my $ out. the bathroom was super girly, with a pink chenille robe hanging on the door and a floral scrunchie on the doorknob, screaming: "wife in the hamptons for the weekend."

the donation still wasn't out, so i asked for it which made him bristle. i felt annoyed like, "yeah, i know it's awkward, your fault dude." with that taken care of, we went into his bedroom. i started to fold back the duvet so we wouldn't get oil or cum on it, and he said, "oh don't do that yet. let's go sit in the hot tub." it was a realllllly hot day and the last thing i wanted was to get into a steamy hot tub. he could see that i was reluctant, and he said, "i made it kind of cool, so we could cool off." ok. sure. i followed him to what i assumed was gonna be a little deck or something, but it was actually just the other bathroom, where there was a BATH TUB with jets, all fired up, bubbles and everything. i was thinking THIS IS NOT A HOT TUB.

he slid into the tub, and i was standing there. i really didn't feel like taking a bath, but i could tell he didn't want the possibility of a stray blonde hair in his bed so i got in the tub. like the ocean, i don't turn my back on a new client ever. so i got in facing him, despite his manhandling efforts to position me with his dick resting in my ass crack. NOPE. it was awkward and weird. the guy was rude, kept begging me for a blow job, asking me to sit on his dick. he jammed his big fingers in my pussy, it felt gross and i told him not to do that again. he kept trying and and was just manhandling me so much. i hated being there but i had a feeling things wouldn't go very well if i tried to just leave. so i dirty talked him till he was super hard, got him off, took a quick shower and got the hell out of there.

listen, i arrived there with the intention of giving this guy an awesome massage, not rushing, leading him through some fun times before the happy ending. i like to provide a quality experience for my clients. but if you're gonna be a weirdo, never make any eye contact, beg me to suck your dick, insist on keeping a sporting event blaring on every tv in every room of your house, and manhandle me to the point where i'm afraid of you, i'm gonna want to leave as soon as possible.

 i threw on my clothes and when i checked the time upon getting back outside, i saw that i'd only been there for a little over half an hour. whoa. record time.

after that, i just kind of didn't wanna work anymore and my phone was barely ringing anyhow. so i just went to the beach a lot with my sister, walked around town, window-shopped, and went to museums. i needed a vacation anyway.

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